Get in on the Ground Floor

Mid-week, another Presidential milestone was passed – my second birthday as the head of a fictional Administration. As with last year, I was disappointed to see that no Marilyn Monroe look-a-likes leapt from cakes and no one sang me a single verse of Happy Birthday Mr. President.

Still, all was not lost. My Ministers were on hand (check the archives, not only do I have ministers – they even used to post) for some low key celebrations and I added a shiny new Nintendo Wii to my collection (do yourself a favour and get one). The highlight though was clearly the gift I received from the First Lady – the novelty t-shirt pictured above (the blog address is on the back). For the record, those are my real pecks, and no I don’t work out.

As I wore my new t-shirt out and about on Saturday, I was pleased by the response. Shopkeepers congratulated me on my fake position and passers-by promised to keep an eye out for me on the upcoming ballot. It made me wish that my official campaign to seize office in this country was a decade or two closer than it’s currently scheduled to be…

All that positivity though got me thinking. After convening my cabinet we agreed that it’s time to being the viral campaign of hearsay and propaganda that will lift this Administration from relative obscurity – to national renown. To aid in this cause, I’m offering to supply Presidential t-shirts to loyal AFP citizens for cost price (which, incidentally is $45 – novelty t-shirts don’t go cheap). If you’re interested in being a part of the juggernaut (hurry because it’s on the launch pad), email me at australiasfirstpresident@gmail.com with your request. Remember, nothing expresses your serious political views more eloquently than a hilarious (or in this case, novelty) t-shirt.